To find love or To simply have a moment of feeling secure...Emotional dependancy!
Sometimes we feel lonely and we just want to be with somebody to have that feeling of being loved and secure, with hugs and those arms all around us taking care of us! You just want to feel that warmth feeling, to feel that kind of affection with another human being, and to feel somehow that illusion of being love. Yes, an illusion, because it is what's going on; the figment of our ego creating a world of emotional dependency! When we feel like that, we just run our ego world at his full potential to take our power. The result of all this is all kind of emotions; blame, guilt, shame, feeling overwhelmed, anxiety, etc. After a while, we have regrets because, yes, we did it again and again. We couldn't be just alone and take care of ourselves as it supposed to be. We feel ashamed and suddenly we are there trying to num those emotions with alcohol, drugs or whatever comes to us to try to forget what just happened.
That pattern of letting ourselves do something just because we felt lonely is created by ego to bring us to suffer deeply and deeply and to create emotional dependency and attachment toward outside world. To let ourselves think that we are not capable to stay alone or do things by ourselves. This is where we begin to feel not enough more and more and to lower our self-esteem! A little voice will try to comfort us with excuses as for example: It's all good to wanting someone in your life, you are an adult, you work so hard, you can have fun here and there, life is short, it’s just one time, or you deserve to have fun once in a while! All those words are from ego; thoughts and scenarios which creates an illusion that we didn’t do nothing wrong. Then why those feeling inside our body then?
We have those feeling or emotions because we know deep down we did something not so good for ourselves and our wellbeing. This is what ego world want! To diminish ourselves and let us think that we are bad human being!
We are not, we had a life experience and maybe, it is time for us to wake up and create a new life with new behaviors, new actions and new speech, where we find ourselves feeling more love from ourselves. As a result, we feel happier and happier each day, each week and this is where you find improvement, change and transformation…
How could this happen?
Recovery and healing
1st; Begin to accept what was: I accept ...
Take moments to liberate all those emotions that come with it.
2nd; Forgive yourself of whatever you did...
Walk in Nature, do exercise, meditate, do things that enhance your well-being.
3rd; Learn and ask yourself what I will do next time to avoid those actions or behaviors...
Find boundaries that you create to protect yourself from yourself till you are strong enough
4th; Deconstruct and build new ways of doing things by finding strategies to be more conscious of your body and emotions...
There are plenty of resources out there for you and therapist that can help you to become strong and build your self-esteem
5th; Apply and integrate what you learn and find ways to fulfill your heart with happy moments.
Each day, do what you love and create inside yourself self-love and happiness
BE aware and learn authentically who you are!
With lots of love,